Film Review: Tees Maar Khan

Sheila Ki Jawani!

Cast: Akshay Kumar, Katrina Kaif, Rajiv & Raghu Ram
Director: Farah Khan
Rating: Minus * Fully Faltoo (I don’t give negative ratings. But this film deserves one)

My husband was keen to see this film on the day of its release and since I also love watching films, I joined him. Vignesh accompanied us as he was free. That’s how we landed up at Cinemax Sion for the 11 pm show on Friday night.

The Story: Is there one? Ok, will give it a try.

Tabreez Khan aka Tees Maar Khan (Akshay Kumar) is a con artist. He roams the world and makes big money while his mother believes that he is a movie director. He is in love with Anya Khan (Katrina Kaif) who aspires to become an actress. That’s when she dances to the famous song, ‘Sheila ki jawani’ – the only light (please note that I am not saying highlight) of the film.

The CBI gets their hold on TMK, only he manages to escape, don’t you dare ask me how. Later, he goes 50-50 on a deal with Siamese twins (Rajiv & Raghu Ram) who are thieves in their right too. TMK makes use of actor Athish Kapoor (Akshaye Khanna) and about 200 villagers to rob a non-stop train that is carrying Rs. 500-crore worth of loot. You should see the film to believe the horror that unfolds. Only this film does not belong to the ‘horror’ genre and I would have stayed clear of it if that had been the case.

My Perception: Akhay Kumar has finally come out of his dumb phase and has done a better role than his last few films. Farah Khan has managed to make Katrina Kaif dance to her tunes and how! Katina has done a superb job of dancing to ‘Sheila ki jawani’. Those are the only points worth talking about.

The story by Shirish Kunder is too dumb for words. Rajiv-Raghu duo did their act well - but isn’t there something called intelligent humour? Maybe Farah Khan and her brother Sajid Khan are unaware of its existence. They keep spoofing other flicks so much that there is just nothing creative in their works. I suppose we cannot blame them if we are foolish enough to go see their films paying 200 bucks for one ticket.

I wanted to get up and slap Athish Kapoor (Akshaye Khanna) when he kept screaming for an Oscar to begin with and later just screeching his head off. That was one sick character. Akshaye Khanna might not be the best of actors, but I never knew he was so bad. Then there was the headless ghost episode that was so disconnected with the story. What purpose it served, I know not.

Songs galore. The music was good and probably created a distraction from the lack of a theme.

Verdict: This is probably the dumbest movie that I saw in 2010.

* Silly
** Shaky
*** Smart
**** Snazzy
***** Super